Characters

The most important character in the short story “You can’t touch me” by Blake Morrison is Ian Goade, the narrator. Apart from him, the Foster family can be analysed collectively, while Mrs Baynes is relevant for her attitude in the conflict. Here, we will only discuss Ian Goade and the Fosters.

Ian Goade

Ian is the narrator and the main character in the short story. Consequently, most of his characterisation is conveyed through his own perspective of the events and his attitude and thoughts.

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Inner characterisation

The way he talks about himself and the conflict triggered by him physically coercing a pupil conveys his inner characterisation. The fact that he is “a little touchy on the subject” (l. 4) of him being a primary teacher and being judged by others as somehow an inferior professional, hints from the beginning that Ian is a frustrated man.

Then, when he talks about Campbell, who is a student and a bully, he uses sarcasm and offensive words, further indicating that he has a problem with the child being aggressive and he thinks he could straighten him up:  

From what I knew of Campbell, his self-esteem didn’t need building up but stamping down. Perhaps if I’d had him, I could have knocked him into shape – not because I’m a better teacher than my colleagues but because I’m a man, and kids like Campbell lack positive male role models. (ll. 12-16)

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The Foster Family

The Foster family is formed of the mother – Petal, the unnamed husband and the child Campbell.

Campbell

Campbell’s outer characterisation only reveals that he is eleven-years-old (l. 152) and a trouble-maker at school.

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The mother

The mother’s outer characterisation is also done directly by the narrator, who depicts her as an attractive woman:

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The father

The father’s outer characterisation is also rendered regarding looks by the narrator:

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