Themes and message

Dealing with loss

“How to Lose” by Victoria Patterson primarily focuses on how the main characters deal with the loss of a loved member of their family. We learn that the death was particularly traumatic for AJ: “My sister, AJ’s mother, died last year of an accidental overdose. AJ found her. He said she looked like a mannequin of his mom. He can’t look at pictures yet. Therapist says this is normal” (ll. 82-84). He is seeing a therapist and has the support of his aunt but has not fully recovered from the traumatic experience. The challenge he faces in his swimming lessons is symbolically connected to this as well. He describes being underwater as something quite frightening for him, “ 'like a big empty space that can swallow me’ ” (l. 57). Later Natalie will also associate his feeling  underwater with her sister’s death, “imagining the terrible sound, a pulsing nothing that swallowed her sister” (ll. 143-144). Therefore, AJ overcoming his issues with swimming symbolises a much more serious subject – overcoming and dealin...